updates

I just wanted to write a quick blog to update y'all on how things are going.

I ended up not driving to go stay with the Williams Family but I will be flying there in two weeks!

Our home study is scheduled for March 19th and our social worker told me she would most likely have it back to me in a week. I couldn't believe she was willing to get it back to us that fast! Almost everyone I called said it would take 30 days and she is going to do it in a week! Well Lord willing of course.

Please be praying I can get all the paper work done for our home study and please be praying for wisdom as we will have to answer some very hard questions about why we want to do this and how we plan to care for the baby. The why is not hard and the how we plan to care for him is not hard either but proving to the country he is from that we are able to care for him might be hard. So if you think about it could you please be praying that God would begin working even now in the hearts of the people involved and that if this is God's will he will give us favor with them.

Those are all the things for now. Not much to report but news none the less.

Thank you all for following our story. It has blessed me so much to see how many people are supporting this possible adoption. We will keep moving forward and do everything we can to get him as long as the Lord keeps opening the doors.

I thank God for giving Jason and I the desire to be this child's parents and I pray if it is God's will that we will get to bring him home soon!

Vanessa

Paper Pregnancy (adoption term)

Have you ever heard the term paper pregnancy??? It is what they say about someone who is in the process of adopting a child. I always loved that saying but it came true for me today. We are trying to get all the paperwork done for our homestudy as fast as we can and part of that required a trip to the doctor. Today Jason and I had to go to the doctor to get a TB test and get a letter signed saying we are in good health. This was the first time we have done something for the adoption outside of the house and it was soooo much fun. After we left the doctors office we celebrated with a small Frappe from McDonald's and a dollar movie. So here is where the paper pregnancy part comes in. I remember being pregnant with Kenya and after our first sonogram with her we went out to eat to celebrate. I remember how excited and giddy I was all day and that is exactly how I felt today. I don't really know how to describe it but it is so neat to be moving forward.

I got to see some new pictures of the baby we want to adopt today and it overwhelmed me with joy but it also broke my heart. There is a picture where he was leaning out of his nanny's arms to see a toy and it reminded me so much of Judah. I also read that his nanny had to leave him for a little while and he cried most of the time and wouldn't eat. I got so sad thinking about him having to leave her if we get to adopt him. Of course he needs a Mommy and Daddy and if the Lord allows us to adopt him I know we will bond with him and he will bond with us but she is the only Mommy he has ever known. I know it is going to be hard for him to leave her. My heart has been heavy for that sweet boy today.

You see all these emotions today??? Remind you of being pregnant??? Happy sad happy sad...

In other news the Williams Family has invited me to come stay with them for a week. Patrice and Matt are going to teach me how to care for their son Jonah who also has EB. If you have never read their blog you HAVE to check it out. They are an amazing family and I am so blessed that they are allowing my to come stay with them! I am planning on going at the end of this week!!!

Please be praying for my family while I am gone. This is the first time I am going to leave Judah and he is a Momma's boy!

Those are all the things I can think of to update you on. Please feel free to ask us any questions that you might have.

Vanessa

God is AWESOME!!!! Home Study update

I was starting to feel like things really hit a stand still. I felt like I was taking everything into my own hands and not trusting God with this adoption. I stepped back prayed and tried to keep reminding myself that God is sovereign over all things.

We were having a really hard time finding a home study agency we felt comfortable with. Our friend Kenny told us about a company his friends used to adopt two of their kids and they had nothing but good things to say about the company. I hadn't really heard of the company so I wasn't really wanting to jump on another crazy long phone call just so they could tell me they couldn't do it. I spent some time in prayer and then I thought I would go over the list of home study companies that our adoption agency had given us and wouldn't you know it the last one on the list was the same one Kenny recommend! I couldn't believe it. I called them right away and the director talked to me for a really long time and explained soooo much to me. I told her all about the child we wanted to adopt and she was excited for us. I told her we wanted to get moving on this right away so she told me to fax her our birth certificates, social security cards and our application and she would get working on our background checks to speed things up! I couldn't believe it the Lord provided someone who was personally recommended and was wanting to get this done as fast as we are!!!!

God is so faithful! We don't know for sure if we will get to adopt this baby but we will keep moving forward and trust that whatever God ordains is right!

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I just wanted to clear up what I meant when I said we can't talk about it. Here is what we are not allowed to do... we can't say where he is from, what his name is and we can't post a picture other then that we are good to go. I will be keeping up with the adoption blog so y'all can join us on this journey I just wont post any of those things above.

Please Read!

I just found out that we have to stop talking about pursuing Baby A until we have been approved by a social worker and have an official commitment to his adoption. The reason is it puts him on a "virtual hold". Thank you all for your understanding. I am new to all of this and I want to make sure we are doing things right!


If you have posted a blog about us being his parents or about us trying to adopt him please take it down ASAP. We don't want to do anything that could jeopardize anyone's chances of getting him.

Since the beginning we have said we don't want to compete for the Baby. We love him and would love to adopt him but it is our desire to see him adopted into a loving family who will teach him about Jesus even if it's not ours.

I hope all of this makes since.

Thank you guys for understanding!

Vanessa

Time Line

Our Friend Stephanie asked how long we would have to go to the country Baby A is and how many trips we would have to take. As far as I understand it here is how this whole process will work.

We will schedule a home study to be done which will take a few weeks for them to get to us. Then it will take about 30 days from the time it is done for the social worker to complete it. After that it will get sent to Baby A's government for approval along with some other paper work. If they approve it all then we keep moving forward.

I'm not sure if it takes a few months for them to approve the paper work or if it just takes a few months of waiting after they approve it but once those months have passed Jason and I will both go to the country Baby A is in for 10 days. During that trip we will get to spend about 3 days with Baby A. I soooo wish we could spend that whole time with him! We will then decide if we want to keep moving forward or we could back out at that point which wont happen. We are 100 percent committed to this baby!

Then we have to come home and wait a few more months then we both have to go back for court. After our court date we have to wait for ten days before we can take Baby A home. We both have to stay for about 10 days that trip then we will go to court. After that we can both fly home then one or both of us could go back to get Baby A or one of us could stay there for those 10 days (after court) then bring him home alone or we could both stay the full two and a half weeks until we could bring him home.

We are not sure what we are going to yet. We do know that we will both be flying home with Baby A because of his medical needs I don't think one of us could do that alone.

The most important thing right now is that we find a well known trusted agency to do our home study.

I want to make sure everyone knows Baby A could get adopted by someone else at any point we are not guaranteed to get him. We are moving forward in hopes of being his forever family though!

Vanessa

Be still my soul

I feel like I have hit a wall... no scratch that a MOUNTAIN!!! International adoption is very confusing and today I was a little discouraged. We want to make sure we are doing everything right but we also want to get moving as fast as we can.

I thought I was trusting in the Lord to work everything out but in reality I was the one trying to make everything happen. I was finding the adoption agency, I was finding someone to do the home study it was me me me... Then I hit the mountain. And I realized that God is the only one that can move that mountain. Nothing happened that will keep us from moving forward I'm just having a hard time knowing for sure who to use for the home study and adoption.

I am planning on spending the next few days praying and seeking God on this adoption. I don't want to waste any time but I also know that my heart has to be right and God has to come first in all of this. If you are a Christian will you please join me in praying for God to comfort my heart and give us wisdom as we move forward.

If you are not a Christian and would like to know how to be born again please click HERE.

The government where Baby A is wants someone who already has a child with EB in the home or has medical experience to adopt him. We have neither of those things but we are willing to do whatever it takes to prove to the government that we can care for his needs and keep him safe. Our insurance will cover in home nursing care (as long as a doctor prescribes it) that is HUGE and hopefully will help our case, I am planning a very special trip to go spend some time with the Williams family Patrice is going to teach me how to do bandage changes and over all how to care for their son Jonah who has EB. I am going to log my hours and hopefully meet up with a few more families whose children have EB and get as many hours of training as I can. I am going to be contacting DEBRA to find out if there is a doctor in our area who has experience with EB and hopefully can be Baby A's doctor. I am trying to get all of these things done before the home study so once it is written up it will show how ready we are to care for Baby A. Keep in mind, Lord willing, we will be getting the home study done in the next few weeks.

None of these things are going to work out and none of these things are going to happen unless the Lord allows them to. I trust that whatever God ordains is right and I pray that His will would be done.

This is my hearts cry tonight...


"Be Still, My Soul"
by Catharina von Schlegel, 1697-?
Translated by Jane Borthwick, 1813-1897

1. Be still, my soul; the Lord is on thy side;
Bear patiently the cross of grief or pain;
Leave to thy God to order and provide;
In every change He faithful will remain.
Be still, my soul; thy best, thy heavenly, Friend
Through thorny ways leads to a joyful end.

2. Be still, my soul; thy God doth undertake
To guide the future as He has the past.
Thy hope, thy confidence, let nothing shake;
All now mysterious shall be bright at last.
Be still, my soul; the waves and winds still know
His voice who ruled them while He dwelt below.

3. Be still, my soul, though dearest friends depart
And all is darkened in the vale of tears;
Then shalt thou better know His love, His heart,
Who comes to soothe thy sorrows and thy fears.
Be still, my soul; thy Jesus can repay
From His own fulness all He takes away.

4. Be still, my soul; the hour is hastening on
When we shall be forever with the Lord,
When disappointment, grief, and fear are gone,
Sorrow forgot, love's purest joys restored.
Be still, my soul; when change and tears are past,
All safe and blessed we shall meet at last.

Hymn #651
The Lutheran Hymnal
Text: Psalm 46:10
Author: Catharine Amalia Dorothea von Schlegel, 1752, cento
Translated by: Jane Borthwick, 1855
Titled: "Stille, mein Wille"
Composer: Jean Sibelius, b. 1865, arr.
Tune: "Finlandia"

Adoption Agency's and Home Studies

Well today was a crazy busy day. My goal for the day was to pick an agency to work with and turn in our application. Then I wanted to clean the house, have the kids down for a nap and have lunch on the table when Jason got home today. I don't do those things everyday but I wanted to spend some time with Jason today so I was working hard. Much to my surprise it took HOURS to find an agency that would be able to take on A's case. In fact I only found three out of the hundreds I called... Okay I called 10 or 15 not hundreds but the amount of hours I put in it sure felt like hundreds. Today was just a taste of what's to come. I know we are going to have alot of paperwork and hundreds of hours put into this adoption before it is all over with and I can say with out a doubt it is all worth it for Baby A's sweet face!

I was able to find an agency to work with. They knew all about A's case and they spent a great deal of time warning me that we could start this process and get a home study done but if someone gets one done before us we could be wasting our money. I assured her that we weren't scared of proceeding with this adoption. Jason and I have always wanted to adopt and if we are not A's forever family we hope to use the home study (we haven't done one yet) in the future to adopt someone else. Of course we hope everything will work out for us to be A's parents though.

I also told her we were not wanting to compete for Baby A if someone else was really wanting him and they had their home study done we would back off and see if they were able to adopt him. We love this baby so much we just want him to be in a loving home that will care for his needs and teach him all about Jesus!

After we secured the agency we were going to go through I then spent the next few hours trying to find someone to do the home study. Again much to my surprise only 2 company's could do it for us. We will be choosing one tomorrow. Please be in prayer about that! After we choose the one we want to work with then we will fill out the paper work asap, get our house ready then get the home study done. All of this could take 6 to 12 weeks. Please be praying that the timing works out and we will get everything in order as quickly as possible. Also be praying that whoever we use will process the paper work as fast as they can.

So by the time I found an adoption agency and two companies to do the home study Jason was about forty five minutes away. I was panicked. I wanted the afternoon to go exactly as I had planned it and my plan was quickly falling apart. I rushed to get lunch done and I got it in the oven 5 minutes before he got here. Then I cleaned as much as I could. Kenya was outside playing so I let her enjoy some good old sun with her friends. I put Judah down for a nap and he woke up 5 minutes later... Jason walked in the door and was just as sweet as he could be. Oh and I forgot to make rice for our lunch, broccoli cheese casserole is so much better over rice. I started cooking that as soon as he walked in the door. Oh man this day did not go as planned but it was still a great day. Jason and I did get to spend some time together (even though Judah cried on and off almost the whole time). Kenya enjoyed playing with her friends. And we were able to eat a yummy lunch.

We have so much to be thankful for I never want to take for granted that God has blessed us with such amazing gifts. A house, food, clothes, a FAMILY, His salvation, a church that loves the Lord and teaches the hard truths of God's work, 2 healthy children, 2 children made whole in heaven and one very special little boy overseas who has a piece of my heart even though he doesn't know it yet.

Please keep praying for us as we move forward as quickly as possible. Please keep praying for sweet Baby A.

This is my hearts cry today:

Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
Philippians 4:6-7

We are hoping to adopt ASAP

Jason and I have always wanted to adopt we hadn't really talked about when to start but we trusted that God would work all the details out on the when, where and how out according to His will.

When I was about 8 weeks pregnant with the twins I developed a huge heart for special needs kids before we even knew we were pregnant with twins and before we knew that anything was wrong with them. I thought our baby had downs but now I know God was just preparing me to be Melody and Madison's Mom. Here is the link to our first post about Melody and Madison.

Fast forward to a few months ago I had been thinking and decided we should probably wait until Judah was two to start the adoption process. Jason and I had talked about adopting children with special medical needs but the conversation hadn't really gone very far.

A few days ago I just started thinking there is no way I can wait until Judah is two I want to adopt now. Then I reminded myself we should wait so he would be older. I was having a battle because I was really wanting to start the process ASAP.

So yesterday I saw Baby A's picture on Kristy's facebook page and I clicked on it then fell in love. He has heart issues (I wanted to adopt a baby with heart issues since melody and Madison had heart problems the thought of a heart baby doesn't scare me) and he had EB which didn't worry me one bit since I had been following a few blogs of families whose children have/had EB.

I can not explain it but the more I read and looked at pictured the more I fell in love. I felt like our baby was overseas and I needed to get him right away.

I texted Jason as soon as I got finished reading about Baby A and told him he HAD to call me as soon as he got off of work I had to tell him something. I told him not to worry and that it was exciting. I started telling Jason all about Baby A so now I will tell y'all.

BabyA was born out of a segregate pregnancy and was a TWIN once his parents saw a picture of him and realized something was wrong with him they decided to only take his twin brother home. At first I was really mad at his parents but the more I thought about it I just started to pray for them. There is not a lot of research on EB where he was born and they just may not have known how to care for him. So I have been praying for them and his twin brother every since. As far as I can tell from reading about him he spent the first 10 months of his life swaddled in a hospital bed because they were not sure how to care for him. He has now been moved to a different hospital where is is being bandaged and has his own nanny. The whole time I was talking to Jason I was fighting back tears I had to stop talking a few times because I was crying so hard. At the end of our conversation I asked Jason "so what do you think?" and he said "I'm all about adoption." I said "can I move forward" and he said "of course this is something we have always talked about."

I was sooooo excited! I got off the phone and started contacting volunteers who were working with his case to figure out what all we needed to do to bring him home. We submitted an application a few days ago to an agency but they are no longer working on his case so we will need to pick a new agency on Monday (please be praying for wisdom for us on this choice) and see if we can get approved. If we get approved we will move forward and start our home study as soon as our house is ready.

This has already been an emotional roller coaster and it just started . We were so excited once we found out about Baby A and we faxed the application right away then we found out the government where he is most likely wouldn't let us adopt him because we didn't have experience with EB and I was crushed. Then we found out our insurance would cover in home care nursing as long as a doctor would prescribe it (hopefully that helps our case). Then we found out insurance wouldn't cover his bandages (they cost 5 to 7 thousand dollars a month!!!) then we found out that first lady was wrong and they will in fact cover them.

It seems like everything is falling into place but our hope is not on our feelings or what seems to be but but our hope is on what God's word says. If this is God's will it will work out and if it doesn't then we will trust that God's ways are far better then ours.

Many plans are in a man's heart, But the counsel of the LORD will stand.
Proverbs 19:21

Will you please join our family in praying for all the details big and small. If we are not Baby A's forever family please be praying that his forever family would begin the process to adopt him. I would LOVE to be this boy's Momma but if that's not God's will my hearts desire truly is that this sweet baby would be in a loving home with a family who cared for Him and taught him the hard truths of Gods word. I want him to know that he is fearfully and wonderfully made Psalm 139. His life is not a mistake and God is just and right in all He does!

As he passed by, he saw a man blind from birth. And his disciples asked him, “Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind?” Jesus answered, “It was not that this man sinned, or his parents, but that the works of God might be displayed in him.
John 9:1-3

Father I pray you would use Baby A's life for your glory I pray you would use Baby A to preach the gospel to the ends of the earth if it be your will Lord.

A few ways you can help:

1) Be praying for Baby A's forever family that they would move quickly and bring this baby home soon.

2) Please be praying for us. Please pray that if this is God's will everything will fall into place and we would be able to keep moving forward.

3) Please pray that this would never become about Jason and I but about helping Baby A find His forever family

4) Most of all please pray that God would be glorified through all of these things and His name would be made great!

I have a lot more details to share and I will hopefully be posting blogs as often as I can. I am just warning you some of the posts might be just a sentences long but I want to try to remember everything I can about this process. So please forgive me for any lame posts :)

Thank you guys for taking time to read this new chapter of our lives! I am so excited to see what is going to happen next!
Vanessa