I feel like I have hit a wall... no scratch that a MOUNTAIN!!! International adoption is very confusing and today I was a little discouraged. We want to make sure we are doing everything right but we also want to get moving as fast as we can.
I thought I was trusting in the Lord to work everything out but in reality I was the one trying to make everything happen. I was finding the adoption agency, I was finding someone to do the home study it was me me me... Then I hit the mountain. And I realized that God is the only one that can move that mountain. Nothing happened that will keep us from moving forward I'm just having a hard time knowing for sure who to use for the home study and adoption.
I am planning on spending the next few days praying and seeking God on this adoption. I don't want to waste any time but I also know that my heart has to be right and God has to come first in all of this. If you are a Christian will you please join me in praying for God to comfort my heart and give us wisdom as we move forward.
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The government where Baby A is wants someone who already has a child with EB in the home or has medical experience to adopt him. We have neither of those things but we are willing to do whatever it takes to prove to the government that we can care for his needs and keep him safe. Our insurance will cover in home nursing care (as long as a doctor prescribes it) that is HUGE and hopefully will help our case, I am planning a very special trip to go spend some time with the Williams family Patrice is going to teach me how to do bandage changes and over all how to care for their son Jonah who has EB. I am going to log my hours and hopefully meet up with a few more families whose children have EB and get as many hours of training as I can. I am going to be contacting DEBRA to find out if there is a doctor in our area who has experience with EB and hopefully can be Baby A's doctor. I am trying to get all of these things done before the home study so once it is written up it will show how ready we are to care for Baby A. Keep in mind, Lord willing, we will be getting the home study done in the next few weeks.
None of these things are going to work out and none of these things are going to happen unless the Lord allows them to. I trust that whatever God ordains is right and I pray that His will would be done.
This is my hearts cry tonight...
"Be Still, My Soul"
by Catharina von Schlegel, 1697-?
Translated by Jane Borthwick, 1813-1897
1. Be still, my soul; the Lord is on thy side;
Bear patiently the cross of grief or pain;
Leave to thy God to order and provide;
In every change He faithful will remain.
Be still, my soul; thy best, thy heavenly, Friend
Through thorny ways leads to a joyful end.
2. Be still, my soul; thy God doth undertake
To guide the future as He has the past.
Thy hope, thy confidence, let nothing shake;
All now mysterious shall be bright at last.
Be still, my soul; the waves and winds still know
His voice who ruled them while He dwelt below.
3. Be still, my soul, though dearest friends depart
And all is darkened in the vale of tears;
Then shalt thou better know His love, His heart,
Who comes to soothe thy sorrows and thy fears.
Be still, my soul; thy Jesus can repay
From His own fulness all He takes away.
4. Be still, my soul; the hour is hastening on
When we shall be forever with the Lord,
When disappointment, grief, and fear are gone,
Sorrow forgot, love's purest joys restored.
Be still, my soul; when change and tears are past,
All safe and blessed we shall meet at last.
Hymn #651
The Lutheran Hymnal
Text: Psalm 46:10
Author: Catharine Amalia Dorothea von Schlegel, 1752, cento
Translated by: Jane Borthwick, 1855
Titled: "Stille, mein Wille"
Composer: Jean Sibelius, b. 1865, arr.
Tune: "Finlandia"
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